THOUGHTS ON SOLITUDE

The need for space Inspired by Willa Cather

When I read about Professor St Peter’s struggle with a change of his environment, I was incredibly moved by the process of his creative mind and the lack of contentment with domestic life.  It wasn’t that he wished he weren’t married or didn’t have any children, but his mind recognized unexplored and untried experiences.  He reads the journals of his lost protege and nearly his son-in-law and sees a life of discovery, following one's heart, and it does not fit in the neat domestic space carved out for him. The Professor stares around the attic, his study where he has written a multi-volume history, and yet he is seeking more, trying to understand that need can only be found in solitude.  Space away from the noise and the pestering of an impending move.  He loves his family, but needs his space.

Like the Professor, I love my life. I love my husband, my kids, and my home, yet something feels missing. That lack of contentment isn't due to dissatisfaction but stems from extra creative energy and not enough time. I would give my life for my children, but I also need space to move, think, and create. I wish I were the type of person who recharged by others' energy and could keep creating while navigating the daily demands of home. Instead, I am drained of energy when I am around people, picking up on their vibes without even realizing it until I finally reach a space of quiet separation. Solitude is where I find renewal. In those quiet moments of rest, away from the noise of home and the outside world, I can gain momentum and maybe create something extraordinary. In that space of withdrawal, I can become a better version of myself.